When he insisted on paying for our first date, I thought I’d met one of those rare, old-fashioned gentlemen. He brought roses, gave me a thoughtful gift, opened doors, listened attentively, and paid for dinner without hesitation. I went home smiling, convinced it had been one of the best first dates I’d ever had.
The next morning, I woke up to a message from him. Expecting a sweet follow-up, I opened the attachment instead.
It was an invoice.
A real one—professionally formatted, itemized, and labeled payment due. At first, I laughed, sure it was a joke. Then I read it.
The bouquet of roses required one hug.
The personalized keychain required a coffee date within a week.
Opening my car door required a selfie together.
Pulling out my chair required holding hands next time.
And at the bottom, in bold:
Dinner and tip covered: second date required. No excuses.
I stared at my phone in disbelief. He wasn’t joking. He genuinely believed his “kindness” was something I now owed him for.
I sent screenshots to my best friend. Her boyfriend—who had vouched for him—nearly choked laughing and immediately drafted a fake invoice of his own, billing the guy for “introducing nonsense into our lives.” We sent it.
The man responded furiously, accusing us of being ungrateful and immature. I blocked him.
What could’ve been humiliating turned empowering. It reminded me that generosity with conditions isn’t generosity—it’s a transaction.
Now, when someone insists on paying, I smile… and make sure I know exactly what they think they’re buying.
